Surviving this world without school - 5 things I've learned.

I started writing this blog in the week that the school closure was announced. That's four weeks ago now. I think that tells you how productive I've been since then.

Four weeks of this strange new world. Maybe you're hitting your stride, or maybe you're running out of ideas and feeling panicked about the weeks stretching out before you! Chances are it's a bit of both. I'm certainly finding some positive and negatives. Its been lovely seeing my two play more creatively and spend more time together. Having a four year age gap, this is the first time they've really been in each others lives full time. On the flip side, the noise level is really getting to me!

So no particular order, here's my top 5 things I've learned so far...

1) My 2 to is much harder than my 6yo. I really wasn't expecting this. My 6yo has never been good at self entertainment while my 2yo usually potters happily around the house with me. Turns out the 6yo has adapted much better to the new routine (or lack of!). I didn't anticipate how hard it would be for my 2yo but he's really struggling and its creating a pretty high level of stress at times with some very big emotions coming out. I haven't found a solution to this yet but its interesting to note that when it comes to stress and emotional health in a family, its not always the ones we expect who are struggling the most. 

2) YouTube is a great source of educational songs and drawing tutorials. Seriously, who knew about online drawing tutorials? There's a week of activity right there! Don't know the months of the year? There's a song for that! Honestly I have been under-using YouTube for years. Its much more than annoying toy demos!

3) Doing nothing is exhausting and incredibly time consuming. Let's be honest, we're not doing nothing. We're living in a constant stream of activities, tidying, fetching snacks, cleaning up spills, cooking meals and on and on... Then you're probably also trying to manage working from home, siblings, partners, worrying about how to get to the shops, worrying about family, friends and the entire world. Give yourself a break. Your brain is going to explode!  Keep expectations realistic and maybe try and get an early night every now and then.   

4) Don't poke the bear. If they're busy with something, even if it's not what you planned, leave them be! Chances are it'll collapse into chaos at some point soon so save your energy for then. The best bit of advice I read was rather than trying to cajole children into activities, set something up while they're otherwise occupied and then when they're looking for a change you can have a new activity ready for them to step into. This is obviously a lovely idea that I manage every now and then. Usually I make a cup of tea and flick through my phone for 5 minutes until the inevitable screaming starts.

5) Routine often helps but it's not the only option. A lot of things I've read have advocated a strong daily routine to helps give children a structure. I think for some people this works really well but honestly, if you're a person who dislikes routine in your normal life, trying to put one in now isn't going to be successful and is likely to just stress you out. I'm not a big routine person so instead we have phases of the day and an activity points chart. (See below if you're interested in what this looks like). They key thing to remember is that everyone's experience of lock-down is different. We have to find what works for our family and situation. We're all managing a huge amount at the moment and in this situation its almost impossible to effectively home-school our children, but that OK! We can still  give our children some positive experiences; some fun, some love, some learning, and yes probably a bit more TV than usual!



In case you're interested in a non-routine...

The original blog I started 4 weeks ago aimed to set out my survival strategy. Being an ex-teacher, in my panic I went into planning mode.

I came up with 10 categories for things she should be doing regularly. Each category is worth 5 points a day so the day's total is 50. The plan was to allocate rewards for reaching certain totals. It never really got this far. Instead we just allocate points together through the day and she seems to enjoy tallying them up regardless of reward or sanction. Maybe that says more about my inability to operate a rewards chart. Honestly I could never do it as a teacher either!

My idea is that anything we can think of to do should fit into these categories so it's rewarding a huge range of skills while encouraging both of us to think actively about what we're doing. For example spelling points don't need to be sitting doing 'look cover write' exercises. We could select some words of the day from something we've read then practice them as we're on a walk then write them down in a sentence after about what we saw on the walk. The plan was for it to be fun, flexible and most of all positive. It has certainly managed to stay positive and is at least a good way of us seeing if we've missed reading for two days in a row!

My categories:

1. Move, e.g. running round in the garden might be 2, a cosmic kids yoga might be 3 points, a long bike ride might be 5.
2. Read - any sharing of books right up to independent reading
3. Write - a letter to grandma, a story, a handwriting practice book
4. Spell - we're focusing on our high frequency words so I plan so make some games like bingo using these and make sure we're identifying them in reading and writing. (FYI - bing has not yet happened...)
5. Count - any maths activity really. Measuring, counting etc. School have given us an online maths program to use. (We have an activity book which is doing the trick here). 
6. Create - anything goes. She scores higher for the more independently she works. (Aquabeads and Hama are a winner this week).   
7. Practice - can be able skill your child is learning. We'll be practicing piano, recorder and ballet but we could also include forward and backwards rolls, handstands, learning to tie shoelaces etc. (Probably the one area she scores lowest on)
8. Discover - learning something new, e.g. a virtual tour of a museum, a documentary, finding out more about something they ask about. Its amazing what I've learned from YouTube when my daughter's asked me something I don't know the answer to! You could award high points for being able to engage with information we've learned, e.g. applying it to a situation, writing about it, explaining it to someone else.  I think about doing this but often we don't! This does often fit in well with activities sent from school. 
9. Solo - Anything (except screen time) that's entirely child initiated and done independently that lasts an appropriate length of time. My daughter will sit in front of a screen for hours but need me ever 30 seconds if not so this is one I know will challenge her. 
10. Help - Chores around the house and garden, entertaining her little brother.